One Month To Live

Building an Eternal Legacy

2008-05-09T15:07:17Z

This Sunday is Mother’s Day, so, I want to remind all you guys out there to make sure you do something nice for the ladies in your life. And to the mom’s, I want to say that many times you feel like everything you do gets undone by the end of the day, especially those of you who are mothers of preschoolers. You may feel that everything you do simply has to be repeated over and over again like washing the clothes but they get dirty again by the end of the day; you wash the dishes but they’re dirty again by the end of the day; you pick of the house but it’s worse than it was when you started at the end of the day. Sometimes you may feel like everything you do in life is getting completely undone by the end of the day, but I want you to know what you’re really doing is building something that’s going to last for eternity. The truth is you’re building the life of your child; you’re doing something that is going to last forever!

]]> I’m discovering that the things that look very permanent in life are really the things that are temporary and don’t last. It’s the things that we can’t see that are going to last forever like faith, hope, love, the souls of men and women. So moms, every time you do something for your child remember this -- it’s going to last forever. You’re building an eternal legacy. Always remember that.

Maybe today, everyone can blog with me and let me know some things that you are doing that you know are going to last.

Getting Spiritually Healthy

2008-05-05T15:50:47Z

May 1st was the National Day of Prayer. Our Prayer Team at Fellowship of The Woodlands led a great prayer event in our Chapel in The Woods to pray for our nation, our leaders, our churches, businesses, schools and families. It was followed by a special Kiwanis Prayer Breakfast the following morning where I was invited to speak. I want to challenge all of us to spend some time everyday this month to pray and ask for God’s guidance. Let’s use May as a 30-day challenge to get healthier in every way – healthier spiritually and healthier physically.

]]> I’m starting an exercise regimen in May where with God’s power I am going to seek to work out for an hour, six times a week. The hard thing for me to do, though, is eat right. That’s why I am starting a 30-day challenge to eat healthy in the month of May. I’d like for you to join me in the challenge and let me know your thoughts on eating right and getting healthy.

Also, share with me your thoughts or ideas on getting spiritually healthy. I want to encourage you to go to the Lifestyle section every day on OneMonthToLive.com. We have a lot of tools there to really help you in these areas. Let us know which ones are helping you the most in keeping your challenge to get healthy this month both physically and spiritually.

The Most Important Thing

2008-04-29T14:25:25Z

Well, today is my day off. I always take my day off on Monday because I am usually worn out from the weekend after preaching all the services and ministering. In fact, this is one of the busiest seasons Chris and I have ever had in our lives. And the busier it gets, the more intentional we have to be about scheduling the most important thing. On Mondays, Chris and I always go to breakfast or lunch together. It gives us a chance to really talk about the week, our lives together and our family. But most of all we talk about our relationship. It’s so crucial for us to get centered before the week starts.

]]> This week everything really starts for us tonight. At 10:30 p.m. I will be doing an interview on a radio station that goes all throughout New Zealand about One Month to Live. The strange thing about it is that it’s live but it airs Tuesday morning in New Zealand. So, for me, Tuesday starts really early this week. We’ve discovered that the busier our lives get the more important it is to schedule in dates and times just to talk and for Chris and I to continually work on our marriage relationship. This is so important for us because in marriage you’re either growing closer together or you’re moving further apart.

So, I’d love to hear from some of you about how your relationships are going with your One Month to Live Lifestyle. What are some of the things you’re doing to get intentional about scheduling time for the people who are most important in your life?

Living Intentionally

2008-04-25T23:12:59Z

Before we started living out the One Month To Live lifestyle, Chris and I always had good intentions but we were never really intentional. Now, rather than hoping we can fit things into our schedule we are learning to “make time” for the important things. My son, Steven, got a new bike for his birthday, and we’ve been going on bike rides the last three days - and having a great time. I’m learning more and more that you have to make time to do the things that are the most important.

]]> I’ve found that asking that clarifying question if I had one month to live each and every day helps me live an intentional life. I have to make sure that I schedule in those times that are most important. Have you discovered the fact that if you don’t decide what’s important everyone else will be glad to decide it for you? The thing that’s been the most effective about the One Month To Live lifestyle that we’ve heard from so many people is that they get very intentional about their time. You see, time is your life. You can spend it, invest it or waste it. And if you waste your time, you waste your life.

Would you let me know today how you’ve been getting intentional doing the things that are the most important to you? Maybe some suggestions on calendaring, or maybe just a story of how you’ve made time to do something that was most important. How did you schedule it and how did it make you feel?

Turning Ordinary Moments Into Extraordinary Ones

2008-04-24T20:28:23Z

This past weekend, Chris and I had the privilege of speaking at Saddleback Church in Southern California. The best thing about it was the time we got to spend with our friends, Rick and Kay Warren, as well as Tom and Shaundell Holloway. Rick Warren, the Pastor of Saddleback Church, has been a real mentor to me for many years. He is an amazing guy who is so down to earth and passionate about helping people find their purpose in life. I’ll never forget going to Saddleback Church 14 years ago. All Chris and I had then was a dream to plant a church that would help people experience Christ rather than religion and be relevant to our generation. Pastor Rick and his wife, Kay, became personal mentors to us and great encouragers. It’s been an amazing ride over these14 years to see all that God has done at Fellowship of The Woodlands. People often ask us in interviews, “What’s the secret to Fellowship of The Woodlands growth?” We always tell them it’s a miracle of God. We love our church, and we love how the people at FOTW are constantly reaching out to make a difference in the world.

]]> This weekend is our son Steven’s 13th birthday. It’s hard to believe. When we started the church, he wasn’t even born yet. It’s amazing how fast time flies. Our daughter, Megan, just turned 16 and got her driver’s license. Look out! It seems like just the other day I was buckling her into her car seat; and now she gets into the car, buckles herself in and drives off. For those of you who have preschoolers and find life really crazy right now, take my advice. Enjoy every moment because they grow up so fast.

Speaking of enjoying each moment, here’s my challenge for you today. Share with me a moment that you really took advantage of recently to experience life to the fullest. It may be just an ordinary moment, but you made it extraordinary by just appreciating it all the more.

Feelings of Forgiveness

2008-02-07T21:04:29Z

One thing many people have done in their One Month to Live Challenge is forgive others. When we live as if this is our last month on Earth, we begin thinking about what it would be like to meet our Maker. We would want to make sure that we’ve forgiven everyone and have asked for forgiveness from others before we meet God.

]]> Forgiveness is often misunderstood. Forgiveness is not pretending like someone didn’t hurt you. Forgiveness is not saying, “Hey, it’s okay, it’s no big deal.” No, forgiveness is saying, “What you did hurt me deeply, but I choose to forgive you for my own sake, with God’s power.” Forgiveness is for our own sake because when we hold on to bitterness, we are the ones who hurt the most.

People have asked what if they have done everything they can to mend a relationship and put it back together, yet the other person won’t respond. Scripture says you are to do everything within your power to live in peace with all people. Once you’ve done everything you can, you have to give it to the Lord and move on but in your heart you must forgive.

Another thing we misunderstand about forgiveness is the difference between forgiving and rebuilding a relationship. You need to forgive someone who has hurt you but you may not need to rebuild your relationship with them. You should wait until you can rebuild trust. You should forgive instantly, but it takes time to build trust back. It’s important to understand that forgiveness doesn’t mean you allow someone to continue hurting you.

Perhaps the most misunderstood aspect of forgiveness is that it is a choice, not a feeling. We are to choose to forgive whether we feel like it or not. A lot of people just wait until they feel like forgiving. We should forgive whether we feel like it or not. It’s not a matter of what we feel like. When I choose to forgive, something amazing happens and eventually the feelings come along. That’s why Jesus told the disciples we should forgive 70 times 7. That means He was saying that anytime we are hurt, we are to forgive and then we are to keep forgiving whenever the hurt comes back to our heart and mind. We just say, “God, by your power we choose to forgive them.” Then, when the hurt comes back to our heart and mind a few minutes later we have to give it back to God again. You continue to forgive over and over again. So whether you feel like forgiving or not, you choose to forgive for your own sake and by God’s power. Soon the feelings of forgiveness will follow your act of obedience.

I encourage you to share your stories of forgiveness. Have you had an experience where it has been very difficult to forgive? Do you have a question about forgiveness? Have you experienced how the feeling of forgiveness follows the act of forgiveness? What happened and did it surprise you? How did it make you feel?

Little Things Make a Huge Difference

2008-01-31T14:17:51Z

Today is my son Joshua’s 18th birthday and it’s a big celebration day. It seems like just the other day I was buckling Josh into his car seat and now he buckles himself in and drives off. The years sure fly by. Maybe the most important principle in the one-month- to-live lifestyle is the principle of Love Completely. I say this because the biggest regrets most people have at the end of their lives have to do with relationships.

]]> Life seems to pass by so quickly. Too often, we don’t stop to do the little things that make all the difference. For me, the little things have been the most important part of my One Month to Live Challenge. When I started taking time to meet my two sons at their favorite restaurant once a week--to have the chili cheese fries and Cokes ready and then talk with them for an hour made such a difference in our communication and in our connecting with each other.

What Chris and I have found in taking the One Month to Live Challenge and then living the lifestyle is that the little things make a huge difference. What little things are you doing in your One Month to Live Challenge that are having a big impact? I would love to hear from you. We can all learn a lot about the little things from each other.

The Bucket List and Relationships

2008-01-18T15:05:37Z

The other day, Chris and I went to the movie, “The Bucket List”, starring Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman. It’s about two guys who find out they are terminally ill so they make out a “bucket list”—a list of stuff they’ve always wanted to do before they kick the bucket. The interesting thing is, Morgan Freeman’s character is a man of faith and Jack Nicholson’s character is an atheist. Toward the end, the one who has faith really makes an impression and a difference in the life of the other one.

]]> One of the characters has a lot of money, so they do a number of crazy things that cost a lot of money. But the hardest thing for them to do is repair their relationships. One of them needs reconcile with his daughter, and it really scares him.

That’s also what I’ve found when it comes to the One Month to Live Challenge. The hardest things we do often involve relationships, especially asking for forgiveness. Chris and I sometimes have to ask forgiveness of each other in our marriage—great marriages are built on forgiveness because we all hurt each other at times. We are learning to be quicker at asking forgiveness and forgiving each other.

So, what about you, who is it that you need to forgive today? Maybe it’s a phone call that you need to make or maybe it’s someone who has hurt you deeply and it’s really hard for you to forgive them. Maybe today is the day to step forward toward the relationship, and take a step toward living with no regrets.

The Race Set Before Us

2008-01-15T15:43:24Z

Last Sunday, Chris and I ran a half-marathon here in Houston. The good new is, we are still alive. The great news is, we both finished it together! Our time wasn’t that great, I think we came in 5,000-something out of 10,000 runners so we were pretty average. But, we weren’t worried about all the other runners, especially the really competitive runners. We were just concerned about finishing together—that was our goal. And, we crossed the finish line hand-in-hand. Our son Ryan ran the full marathon and finished 16th in his age group, which was pretty amazing.

]]> One of our One Month to Live 30-Day Challenge goals was to run in a half-marathon, together. We did it, and it made us feel great - at least about the accomplishment, even though we didn’t feel too great right when we finished.

At one point, we were tired and we were running behind a guy wearing a t-shirt with a passage from Hebrews that said, “Let us run with endurance the race set before us.” It reminded me that each of us have a race to run and it’s a race that only we can run because it’s an individual race that God has placed in front of us. We are not to look at anyone else, we are to look at what God has for us—the race he has set before us to run.

So what is the race that God has set before you? What are some things that God wants you to do, especially for others? What things are you doing right now? What are some goals that you have? Maybe they are long-term goals that will take you more than a month to accomplish. I know for us, we had to train for longer than a month to run the half-marathon. What are some things that you really have to train for to run the race that God has set in front of you?

Staying on Track in the New Year

2008-01-04T23:30:24Z

I love the New Year, don’t you? It’s a time for reflection and new beginnings. Every year, Chris and I review our goals and look at where our lives are going. We talk about what we want to accomplish and where we feel God is leading us. One of our new physical challenges this year is to run the Houston Marathon with our son Ryan. Chris and I will run the half marathon while Ryan goes the full distance. We’re excited and frightened at the same time. Have you ever faced a challenge that made you feel that way?

]]> In preparing for the race, we’ve really had to stick to our training schedule. There have been plenty of times when we thought it would be more fun to read a book or watch some TV instead of going for a run. Like any commitment or resolution we make, it’s easy to get started, but much harder to stay motivated. But we know that if we don’t tie up our running shoes and head out the door, we’re going to really struggle to reach the finish line.

Maybe you’re like me when it comes to the New Year. You begin reading your bible every day, start a physical workout routine, set your priorities and you’re off and running. But then life interrupts your well intended plans. Your schedule gets really crowded and, before you know it, your priorities begin to get fuzzy again. How can you stay consistent? What can you do to make your good intentions reality?

Something that has really helped Chris and me is to keep asking the clarifying question, “What would you do if you knew you only had 30 days to live?” This helps us remember why we made the resolutions we did and what’s really important to us. It encourages us to remain consistent and do the things that matter most. One of the reasons we’ve expanded the OneMonthToLive.com website to include Lifestyle information is so that you can use some of the tools that have helped us over the years. We hope the tools and information will be helpful and fun as you start using them.

What things do you do to stay consistent and achieve your goals? How are you living life differently this year than in the past? We look forward to hearing from you and learning some new ways to keep on track.

The Meaning of Christmas is Meaning

2007-12-20T18:58:22Z

It’s hard to believe that Christmas is almost here! We are getting ready for 16 Christmas Eve services at Fellowship of The Woodlands. As I am preparing, I have been praying and thinking about the true meaning of Christmas. Really, when you boil it all down, the meaning of Christmas is “meaning”.

]]> Because Christ came, there is meaning and purpose in our lives. If Christ had not come to this earth, there would be no meaning, no purpose, no reason to get up in the morning. We might as well go party every day. We could forget about helping others and making a difference because there would be no purpose. The great new is that because of Christmas, life has meaning and life has purpose.

I want all of us to start thinking about the New Year and the purpose God has for us in 2008. What are some of the “One Month to Live” resolutions that you are making in January? What resolutions would you make if you knew you only had one month to live? I would like to hear from you. Please write in and share the top two or three things you want to do in January to live a no-regrets life.

The Difference a Day Makes

2007-10-26T22:02:58Z

Many times we think about the things we want to do to change our lives, but we forget to change the things we can today. Author and speaker, John Maxwell, says that so many of us underestimate the power of today. If I can change what I do in a 24 hour time frame, I can change my life.

]]> For Chris and me, it’s the little things we changed in our daily schedule that changed our lives. Like Stephen Curtis Chapman’s recent hit Miracle of the Moment expresses, we are learning to live in the moment.

It’s amazing to us that the more people we talk with, the more we realize what an important question it is to ask every day of your life -- “If I knew I had one month to live what would I do and how would I live this day?”

Yesterday, I had the opportunity to be interviewed by KSBJ, a local Houston radio station, about the “One Month to Live Challenge”. One of the DJ’s on KSBJ shared with me that his father is going through the last months of his life. This has caused him to pose the question on air, “What would you do it you knew you had one month to live?”

Chris and I have been so moved by the powerful way you’re living your lives with such passion and purpose. It’s so exciting to read all of your stories on the blog!

Tell us, what are some of the little things as well as the big things that you are doing during this “One Month to Live – 30 Day Challenge” that are making the greatest impact in your life?

Knowing What to Do and What Not to Do

2007-10-18T20:25:03Z

So, how are you doing on your one-month-to-live experience? I know there are going to be some ups and downs in our journey for the next 30 days, but don’t get discouraged. If you keep asking that question, “What would I do if I knew I had one month to live?” each and every day, it will make a tremendous difference in your life.

]]> Psalm 90:12 says, “Teach us to number our days so that we may gain a heart of wisdom.”

I think what I need more than anything else in life is wisdom from God. I need wisdom to know what to do, and I need wisdom to know what not to do. When my schedule gets overcrowded, I feel overloaded and stressed because I try to do too much. More important than a “to do” list for me is a “not to do” list. For some things, I just need to learn to say no.

One of the ways God teaches me what to do and what not to do is through pain. Whenever my life gets overloaded and I am trying to do too much, God allows a painful experience to come my way. I’ve discovered we usually don’t change when we see the light but are more likely to change when we feel the heat.

Proverbs 20:30 says, “Sometimes it takes a painful experience to make us change our ways.”

I remember several years ago I was living in a constant state of overload. I started experiencing anxiety attacks that made me have to get serious about examining my life. God really used that pain to wake me up to the fact that my life was out of balance. Although I was doing many “good things” not all of them were “God-things”.

It was that painful experience that really woke me up to the fact that my life had been out of balance for years. I was trying to do too much for God. I think that’s an easy thing for me to fall into – trying to do way too much rather than depend upon Him. That experience made me realize that our bodies and emotions were not made to live in a constant state of overload.

So, how about you? Have you had a painful experience that’s been a wake-up call about your life being out of balance? Whenever my life starts to get overloaded and over-crowded, God sounds a wake-up call for me to get on my knees and say, “Lord, teach me how to number my days so that I can gain a heart of wisdom.”

I would like to hear from you. Have you gone through a stressful situation with an overloaded schedule? How did you feel? What is God using to wake you up to make the changes you need to make?

I‘m praying for you today that God gives you a heart of wisdom to know what to do and what not to do.

The One Month Experience

2007-10-10T21:54:51Z

As a pastor, I have been privileged to share in the lives of many people as they faced the end of their life on earth. All of them struggled with the stages of grief – denial, bargaining, guilt, anger, depression and acceptance. Most of them made radical changes in their lives when they became aware that their condition was terminal. They took license to say what they really felt and did what they really wanted. They asked for forgiveness and forgave others. They no longer thought only of themselves. They reached out to those they loved and let them know how much they meant to them. They took risks they would have never taken before and allowed themselves to lay aside worry. They gratefully accepted each new day. They seemed to get a new clarity on their priorities, like their relationship to God and leaving a legacy that would endure.

]]> Over the years of watching others live out their last days, I began to ask myself, “Why can’t all of us live more like we’re dying?” Isn’t that how we were meant to live in the first place? So last year, at a staff retreat, I tried a little experiment and asked our team the question, “If you knew you had one month to live, how would you live differently?” I gave everyone a journal and challenged them to live the next 30 days as if they were their last and to write down what happened. The results were nothing less than life changing!

At the end of the 30-day experience, we all had a greater clarity of purpose and a renewed sense of passion for the things that really matter. Many people did some big, once-in-a- lifetime thing like going on a dream vacation to Hawaii with their spouse; finally getting serious about a healthy lifestyle and losing 25 pounds; or reconciling a relationship with a parent that had been neglected for years.

For me, it was the little daily things that took on a whole new meaning and forever changed my life. Just the experience of taking my two youngest children to school became a real joy. I became keenly aware of what a sacred moment in time it was every morning playing 20 questions with my son, Steven, or making up silly songs with my daughter, Megan. I made sure that I met my two oldest sons, Ryan and Josh, at their favorite restaurant once a week after school just to connect.

Many of our staff members did whatever it took to make sure they were at all their children’s ball games, recitals and school events. At the same time I noticed that the team was more productive than ever with things they did at work to make a lasting impact.

I have since come to believe that this “One Month to Live” lifestyle is universal in principle but unique in its expression. If we all lived life as if we had one month to live, we would each spend our days differently, in special ways unique to us. Yet, I still believe we would all live more fulfilling lives that could leave an enduring legacy for all eternity.

Hopefully, you’ll have many more months and years to live. But, if you live your life this month as if you only have one month to live, then you’ll discover how to really live.

So, what would you do if you knew you had one month to live? I challenge you to do a “One Month to Live” experiment. Live your life for the next 30 days as if they are your last and see the powerful change that takes place in your life. Let me know what you do differently and how it changes your life by sharing it in this One Month to Live blog.